Anguished English: Try and . . . Be sure and . . .

(For those who didn't read Anguished English: Literal (Literally), please read Coffee Talk # 18.

My Ears Are Bleeding!
I can just imagine some strange movie in which the "bad guys" (or the antagonists) take the "good guy" (the protagonist) and tie him to a chair.

Let's say that our protagonist is a grammar professor.

So, instead of the normal torture, you know, like beatings and electric shock, the bad guys speak-out sentences with appalling grammar.

They use split infinitives. They use indicative verbs in subjunctive contexts. They say "try and" or "be sure and."

Our hero can take only so much before he cracks. Sweating profusely from his brow, he finally breaks down, and says,

All right, all right! Anything you want! I'll tell you where the plutonium is . . . just . . . oh, please, just speak with proper syntax, verbals, case, and mood. My ears are bleeding!

I Was Assaulted
Recently I was "assaulted" by two phrases which always make me wince. I hadn't seen either one for some time, and so they were not on my mind, but recently, I got "blasted" by both of them in one email. That set the stage for me to "deal" with it here.

In an earlier Anguished English I asked, "How many times do we have to suffer with the mangling and bludgeoning of the English language by educated people?"

I went on to explain that while my English grammar is far from perfect, there are certain basic things we expect from people who are even moderately educated within our society.

The most recent mangling and bludgeoning that has come my way are the phrases, "try and" and "be sure and." Not only did I see both of these in an email, but my wife and I were watching a movie recently in which the main character was a writer. In the movie, the Writer said, "try and." All I could think was, "This guy is supposed to be a writer, and yet he can't even get this basic grammatical construction correct!"

You Do Not "Try And" . . .

Let me explain:

1. Try and: You do not "try and" do something. Someone once asked me, "Are you going to try and memorize your whole lecture?"

2. Be sure and: In an email Bob told Hank to, "Be sure and meet me for lunch at 12:30." Apparently, Bob wanted Hank to be sure of something, and then, not only be sure about that thing, but also to meet him for lunch at 12:30. Is this what Bob wanted? Of course not. But, that is what Bob said.

Friends, we do not . . .

(1) try and do something, and we do not (2) be sure and do something.

We do, however . . .

(1) try to do something, and we (2) be sure to do something.

"And" is a conjunction, which means "together with or along with; in addition to; as well as." (Of course, it is used to connect words, phrases, or clauses that have the same grammatical function in a construction.)

So, let's use the definition of "and," and let's see if it will function in place of the word "to" in these constructions:

"Be sure together with meet me for lunch at 12:30."
"Be sure along with meet me for lunch at 12:30."
"Be sure in addition to meet me for lunch at 12:30."
"Be sure as well as meet me for lunch at 12:30."

This same thing can be done with "Are you going to try and memorize your whole lecture?"

"Are you going to try together with memorize your whole lecture?"
"Are you going to try along with memorize your whole lecture?"
"Are you going to try in addition to memorize your whole lecture?"
"Are you going to try as well as memorize your whole lecture?"

Let me try to bring this to a close. Be sure to use "try to" and "be sure to" and not "try and" and "be sure and."

Do An Experiment
Let's do an experiment. In your day-to-day discussions, TV watching, and sermon/lecture listing, try to count as many "try and" errrors and you can. See how many you can pick out in a week. I've actually seen this error also in professionally pubished books.

Oh . . . stay tuned I'm not done yet. More grammatical issues in future Coffee Talks.

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*The title, "Anguished English" comes from the book of the same name by Richard Lederer . . . a hilarious book that is "An Anthology of Accidental Assaults Upon Our Language" -- see (and if you want to laugh and laugh, buy) it at: Anguished English.

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Free Class:
For those of you who might be interested: I have produced a five-lecture series on audio with notes. I cover the basics of good writing, grammar, punctuation, and more. I've had people with Master's degrees and PhDs go through these lectures, and some of them told me that they learned more on this subject from my five lectures and notes than they had from all of their previous education combined. You can listen to the lectures for free and downlaod the lecture notes as PDFa files (for free) at CES Writing Protocols Lectures.